Thursday, May 18, 2006

The Bittersweet Taste of [Temporary] Freedom

The caged bird stared wearily at the busy world through the dull bars which posed an eyesore in its view. Craving the freedom just beyond the muddy-brown bars was getting tiring.
Whenever will it be free? For a month...Thirty torturous days...It suffered under the immense burden of stressing conditions.
Why? Because of greed. The People had simply caught it in one fell swoop. It was its own fault for paying attention to the food scraps instead of the People.

Stomp. Stomp. Stomp. The thunderous footsteps of the People neared.
The bird acknowledged their presense with a silent shifting of position. It was now in the middle of the cage where none could touch it.
What did THEY want now? It was too early for forced feeding. And too late for songs. The bird kept its eyes shut in a calm pretense of repose.

The gate creaked open.

Today…My examinations ended.

The days of fruitless attempts in forced memory are over. I am finally free.
Free from all burdens of stress and thoughts clouded by doubt.
Free to live my life once again.

And yet I am not as relieved as I'll like to be.
Right now, I should be leaping around like an insane kangaroo on Ecstasy. I should be opening champagne and painting the town red [literally].

However, I'm glumly doing my favourite thing [Idling around] with less energy as before.
Reason being that I know of my dismal Fate. It is the same as knowing when you would die but knowing how. I know which are the exams that are beyond hope and which are the ones I would score in. I know what I would receive, courtesy of my family, after the results are released. And I can't defy Fate this time
[Unless I crept into the school under the cover of darkness and redo the exam papers using my superior ninja skills.]

But in order to continue enjoying life, I tried to alleviate the bleakness which floated around like an ever-present aura.
Hence, I attempted to increase the stakes in the ongoing exam bets [Those who scored highest would have to pay the ones who scored lower.], especially in my weakest subjects. Unfortunately, that failed. But it did reduce the stakes on all subjects to 20¢ per subject instead of varied amounts. So I guess that's something good.

To be free of the exams, but to bear the burden of awaiting the results is like leaping out of the pan and into the fire.

The bird eyes the open gate warily. What is this? The People aren't making any movement. They're just sitting there talking. It edges closer to the open gate.No reaction. It puts its beak out. Still no reaction.
Alas! A shot at freedom! Goodbye food pellets! Goodbye newspaper toilet! And Goodbye and good riddance to you, People!

The bird flew out and was greeted by the unblocked view of the world. Freedom never tasted so sweet. It circled a tree and hopped onto a nearby shrub.

And was seized by brutish paws which threatened to squeeze the life out of it. It struggled and pecked and clawed its captors in a desperate attempt to be free, but to no avail. Nothing escapes the dog's powerful paws.
Despair shattered whatever hope it had left once again.